Who do I invite – excluding extended family or a free for all?

Wedding invites

Deciding who to invite and who to leave out of your wedding can be a real minefield. Though you may want to keep the ceremony small and intimate, your parents and in-laws-to-be may have very different ideas. To help you navigate this tricky subject, and ensure you upset as few people as possible, here are a few things to consider before you write that all important wedding guest list.

What do YOU want?

Like Bridal Guide says, before you even start coming up with a guest list, “You and your fiancé need to come up with a number: an estimate of how many guests to invite. This, of course, will largely depend on your budget and on the size of your reception site.” Think about how big you want the ceremony to be, whether you want more guests to arrive in the evening, and what sort of venue it is you’re searching for. Once you’ve decided what sort of wedding you want, it’s time to start on the guest list.

Talk to your parents

If you think that your parents, or your future in-laws, are going to insist on their brothers, sisters, cousins and godparents being invited, you need to sit them down and talk it through. If you’ve decided against a big wedding, you need to try and get them to understand the day is about you, not them. If the idea of a small wedding really upsets them, see if you can compromise on who gets an invite. Keeping it to adults only, or cutting cousins from the list could help to keep numbers to a minimum.

The benefits of a big wedding

If you can’t dissuade your parents from inviting the whole family, or if you like the idea of having all your extended family at the wedding, don’t fear, there are a lot of benefits to a big wedding. For a start, it gives you the excuse to go all out on a venue. Booking somewhere big and impressive and filling it with all your family can make for a truly fantastic day. What’s more, if you opt for a free for all –  you won’t risk upsetting anyone.

Keeping it small

Excluding extended family from your big day can be tempting for a number of reasons. As well as helping you to keep costs down, it can make the day feel more manageable. Having just your close friends and immediate family at your wedding will make the day more intimate and will help to ensure you’re able to talk to everyone who attends.

There are no right, or wrong, choices when it comes to making a wedding guest list, you simply have to go for the option that’s right for you and hope your family understand.

To find out more about planning the perfect wedding, or to find your dream venue, take a look around our site today.

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